Out out damn cough

Cold (or coryza the word missed by the 2nd place finisher (Canadian) at the National Spelling Bee ....when the heck did Canada become part of our country?) symptoms are improving but now I in addition to the snot factory in my head the nagging cough has started. This is not so good as my surgeon did not want me to COUGH any before my surgery as to avoid traumatizing my already fragile tumor filled rib. Tonight after a day of several brands of cough drops, syrups, etc. finally popped something with codeine in it. I am writing this as I feel my body slowly sliding into unconscious oblivion. Must fight to stay coherent. T minus 7 days until the surgery. Maybe I should wear some backless shirts or do nude portraits before I gain a scar.

Sick day

Well, I have a head cold and wee one got up this am and threw up on me. She has been home today with Grandmother and I have been at work trying to heal the sick. I can't even heal myself...ha,ha,ha. No more barfing but I did check her temperature earlier...100. She is napping now and I am blowing my nose for the 100th time today.

There was an interesting story on Today show this morning about the "modern woman." It was about how the WW2 generation had to work because the men were all gone to war (1st wave), the next generation went to work in non traditional women's jobs (wave 2), and now the current generation is opening up business and working part time/ working from home (wave 3) in order to be both mom and working gal. I sure if we go back in the time machine even more, I suspect we are actually wave 3452. Anyway, I say, whatever works for you.

Crabby pants

No, that's not a description of my child, but me at this moment. I think I am just tired from this particular day. Nothing major just daily stuff. I can't even blame AF, as I just finished 2 days ago. Dh seems a bit of the same emotion tonight too. I think I am missing one of my co workers who left for good last week. This person was also a good friend and advice giver to me. I know it was better for them to move on in order to be happier. I think I am also apprehensive about the upcoming surgery. I have people asking me how I am doing and also I am getting things ready at work for when I will be gone. It will be weird having a scar on my back or side I think. No more string bikinis ha.ha.ha...not that I ever have worn one anyway.

And life resumes

I am living the next 3 weeks before the surgery as normally as I can. It is nice having life return to normal for a bit. I am getting things ready for when I can't be doing much and for my parents to come stay with me. New bed and mattress for the guest room and of course, new bedding (I love buying linens) and rearrangement of old bedding. Nesting, I think this is called..feathering the nest. I've had a lot of nice thoughts coming my way from friends, family, and church. I am usually quiet about my health, but this time I knew I needed some support and prayers. Not just for me but for my dh and wee one...some help for them as I am dealing with all this. And also in some ways, to let my friends know not to ignore symptoms that just won't go away.

I think I have been also coping by shopping. Maybe a little too much shopping but I am a bargain hunter so my cc is not maxed out yet!!!!

Get that sucker out!

I saw my surgeon (who reminds me of "Red Duke" the guy who used to do medical stories on TV in the Dallas area) and he wants to cut. I am relieved actually. I was worried it might be a well, we could take it out now or later or never, you have to decide situation. He says if it doesn't come out, it could break, have no chance of healing, and cause me the greatest pain with every breath I took. He is worried it is so fragile that he has banned me from any heavy lifting until the surgery is done and healed...yes folks that includes the wiggly 2 year old person in my house. I have about 3 weeks before the operation due to some scheduling issues so I had having others do the lifting. I have never had major surgery. He was vague about recovery time but made it sound like I would be fine within a week or 2. I am not so sure as it involves cutting, spreading muscles, taking part of the rib out, general anesthesia and intubation...yikes! Anyway, that's my plans for the month of June.

What happened?

Well, got all my tests today and was a pretty good patient considering I had to down 2 cylinders of barium vanilla smoothie. They gave me a big dose of benadryl so I was pretty chill when the actually did the test. They found a benign tumor in my rib that has probably been growing there a for more than 18 years (that's when I first had pain there). Very slow growing but now it is big and destroying the rib (thus the pain). The doctors were all amazed at my high pain tolerance as this is like having a chronically fractured rib. I'll go see the surgeon next week. I am very relieved that it is not cancer. I have never had major surgery so that part I have to find out about and make a decision.

Randomness

I finally got over the coughing, hacking part of my bronchitis but still am having some really bad pain on the left side of my chest. Now, I have a chronic pain because by a rib being out of whack but this has been really bad especially at night when I am sleeping. So I went to the doctor and became a patient once again (I like being the doctor, not the patient). The xray show one funny spot so I went to get a CAT scan. It was going pretty well until they injected some contrast material in me and I got this horrible about to barf feeling, sneezing, and a bad feeling in my throat. YIKES! They stopped it and sent me home with some allergy medication. The radiologist said the lungs looked good but would study the films more. I got a call from my doctor this morning and she said she wanted to see me in her office today. I went over and she wants to finish the scan, but this time with pre-medication for the allergic reaction I had. They are worried about a lesion on my rib. The scan will be in the morning at the hospital so they can watch me closely.

I am still kind of in denial about all this, after all the pain has been there for a long time, just worse since I have been coughing my head off. Part of me says not to worry until I know more and part of me is in deep introspection about life and possibly having a scary fatal condition. I mean, I am a young healthy mother of a 2 year old, a loving dh, a great job, and a new house. I have reached time in my life which is wonderful so I can't be sick. No way.

Mama, mama, mama,...

With these words, Wee One has verbally acknowledged my presence (or lack thereof). I feel like I am officially her mom now that I have heard her wandering around the house uttering "mama, mama." Initially my dh had said it was a distress signal and that "dada" was the word for happiness.

Going to parents day out has really helped her express herself better to me. There is a little less frustration for her in trying to tell me what she wants. It is so interesting that children at this age can be so emphatic in expressing what they want in so few sounds and words they possess.