I have been quite miserable the past few days making myself miserable. My mom offered a lot of advice that I have turned into unconstructive criticism. Obviously I have some baggage with her and about my parenting. I have felt at moments like an utter failure, letting dh take over and myself crawling into bed. (I think I had some kind of stomach bug too or maybe it was those femara pills). I am more relaxed today and got some perspective on it from reading Ask Moxie (thank you God for the internet mother/sisterhood). As mine and my mother's lives are very different, because I do things differently, she may take it as criticism of her own parenting of me. That is so wild because I see her as a great, wonderful mom to me when I was a kid and I cannot even begin to do what she did without lots of help. She had no help from family or babysitters very much, and was with us at home most of the time except when she was earning her graduate degree in case something happened to my dad. I work outside the home, have Ils in town, a nanny, and am the primary earner in my household. We are different and I can only live my life.
Perhaps some of my reaction is my own insecurity about what I am doing. There are so many choices, ways to do things...I am still agonizing over combinations of preschool, nanny, etc.
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