There I've said it

I want another kid. In spite of yesterday's vomiting child, spoiled milk, up at 5:30 AM kind of day, I want to have another child. No big surprise to anyone, but I want to say it out loud, put it down in writing on this blog, exclaim it to the universe, my request. Another one would be great. I would even love a bigger family (I think?!)

I don't know if I am ready like go see the RE ready, but in my head I am beginning to formulate that if the old fashion way doesn't work in 6 months more, and I feel the same way, I will head to the RE. I started seeing the RE when I was 32, now I am 36. Am I ready yet? Am I strong enough?

Trapped in AI land

Hi guys...sorry for limited posting recently. Our household has been obsessed with American Idol lately. We got the Karaoke revolution game for the playstation and it has been SO MUCH FUN. Even tonight as we were watching Blake Lewis sing Keane's "Somewhere only we know" we were wondering where the crowd meter and crowd boost bars were...sign of too much video gaming!

Plans, plans

The wee one is ready for some outside stimulation so my plan is to put her in Mothers Day out at one of the local churches. She is one the waiting list at 2 places currently. I was going to keep the nanny and send her 2 days a week to Parents day out. One of my friends says a lot of moms use 2 mothers day outs to create 4 days a week and dispense with the baby sitter. That is one idea, but I am not sure it will work for us. At least not right now. The other option is daycare, but maybe when she is older. So many possibilites. At least we are lucky to have possibilities.

Catch up

Well, we are settling into our new house and I am enjoying it very much. After some mourning for the old one and seeing it empty of our things, I knew it was time to move on. There is finally space for all of our things, esp all the baby stuff. There aren't any houses across the street so it feeling like we are way out in the country.

Wee one is thriving aside from the runny nose/ cold every 2 weeks. She is doing more communication with hand signals lately. Such as patting me on the butt to get me to get up from the chair to go get her something!

I am going to have to discuss naps with our nanny. She likes to take wee one out to the mall or her daughter's house (my good friend) and I think we are getting limited nap time. I am personally a fan of naps in her bed, at least an hour so I am going to have to discuss this with her. She is pretty easy going as far as other issues I have brought up with her and does what I tell her to do. I guess I need to give more directions sometimes. Any nanny advice is appreciated.

Feed the Cats

Bottle

The next to the last silicone Avent nipple has torn and been tossed into the trash. Now that we are down to 1 nipple, I am faced with the question. Do I go buy more nipples or just wait for the last one to wear out and venture into the the land of all sippy cups all the time? Wee One can deftly drink out of anything...bottles, cups, straws, stray 7-up cans my dh leaves lying around...etc. But here's the thing, the LEAST messy for her to handle is the Avent bottles that she has been using since birth (She also had boobie for 5 months but that is a distant memory...mammary?!!...hahaha, excuse me).

We have all the different sippy cups, but Mommy who likes to look for the easiest most convenient delivery system of milk esp in the AM when she is not awake yet, loves the bottle. She is almost 19 months and this would be a good time to make this transition. Much to my own mother's dismay I never made a habit of putting her to bed with a bottle...yes I just stick her in there, put the blanket on, turn off the light and some nights she cries....just a little and never for more than a few minutes. Most sippy cups are just glorified bottles in my opinion. The books are so unrealistic in the no bottle after 1 year rule, but I have felt like such a lazy parent for continuing to use them.

Cocoon

I have been in the cocoon of my house and family all weekend. The artic cold came thru here and today's and yesterday's highs were 29 degrees. Not much in the mood to go out as Wee One is getting over bronchitis and it have been more fun to stay inside and cook and bake and watch TV. Thank goodness this only happens once in a while or else I would weigh a lot more. I do have to emerge tomorrow to go to work, but at least I'll have some good leftovers for lunch.

Time to let go

While I have been excited to be moving to a newer, bigger house, there is a part of me that wondering if this is the right thing to do. The current house suits us pretty well but we are outgrowing it. It is a nice size but the layout and lack of backyard that were ideal 7 years ago when I was a single gal are now with 2 cats, dh, and wee one, and more frequent guest visits (grandparents) it is time to move. I am pretty attached to the currently house most days as it was my 1st house I bought, one of the reasons I got to know my dh (he was my housesitter for a month when I was away on fellowship), and there are so many good memories that have been made here.

I know psychologically it will be good for dh and I to buy a house together and it not be only "MY" house anymore. And I know that we will enjoy the new house with all its space and 2007 amenities and large backyard. For the most part the new construction has gone releatively smoothly other than me picking out a white color for the crown molding that now seems to have a purple tint (lavendar) and that we are going to be very, very close on the completion of the house before closing. Maybe it is just cold feet...ha,ha,ha it was like this before I got married! I'm going to keep praying about this.

Fun at the park

It was a bit chilly today, but with the sun out, it was really nice. Wee one and I went to bring lunch to dh at work and then headed over to the park nearby. I have been wanting to take her there, but didn't get a chance until now. It a newer park, built to be accessible to all kids so I wanted to check it out. Wee one played happily and slid down the slide with glee at least 8 times. She applauded another kid (bigger, older) when he slid down too. I looked around the park. It is bordered by the hospital where wee one was born to the south, my RE's office to the southwest, my OB's office to the east, and the high risk OB's office to the west. I last stood here when I was visiting wee one in the NICU one day, wondering about when I could bring her here to play. After the 10th time down the slide, I took wee one (crying all the way to the car) home. We'll be back.

Life 2007

Well, here I am, smack dab in January 2007. The holidays are over, the presents are opened, and the visiting family has departed. The weather has been cold and rainy and life has resumed its normal schedule. The BIG things happening right now concern shelter and job. We are waiting for our new house to be finished and we will be homeless on January 26 if it is not done by then. All fingers and toes are crossed and prayers are being said daily for all to work out. My dh is interviewing for a new job tomorrow and is planning to leave his family's business. He is going to return to his orginal field of work and utilize his college degree again. It is a time of change.

Mom daughter mall time

Yesterday I had an unexpected day off from work due to a miscommunication with dh. It turned out to be great because wee one and I got to go shopping. Not just any shopping, but post-Christmas 60-80% off shopping. We got shoes, jeans, pants, shirts from different cool kids places and ate gyros in the food court. We sure did have fun together. Reminded me of when my mom and I used to go except that wee one primarily communicates with me in non verbal ways. At Gymboree she found the TV area and happily watched Elmo and played with the other kids as all the moms frantically poked thru the sale racks. Such fun! I finally got her some pants that fit her. Turns out she is 12-18 months on bottom and 18-24/ 2T on the top. No more sets for her...only seperates until everything evens out. At Old Navy we got comfy pants, jean pants, cargo pants, stretch pants...so fashionable in such small sizes.

Post-Christmas

1. I hate writing thank you notes. I have been raised properly and have this compulsion to write thank you notes. It is the right thing to do. While I agree with the sentiment and acknowledgement of another's thoughtfulness or generosity, I hate the chore of it. No matter how much I break it down. I think it has been worse since going through a 400 guest wedding and a 150 guest baby shower.

2. I hate overeating. Of course I want to try all the goodies that come with parties and dinners. And while I have a pretty good internal "it's time to stop" I find myself regretting a few things (or many things) I have eaten these last 2 weeks. My favorite hor derve so far...mushroom pastries by Nancy (frozen)....fungus have to be healthy, right?

3. I hate being on someone else's schedule. Family gatherings are wonderful, but I don't get much control as to when and what is happening like I do in usual life. Meal times, nap times, all are at the whims of traditions, family members, people who drop in, etc.

4. I hate the guilt of taking time off from work to do above things. I have to remind myself in the big picture, it doesn't matter how much I work, but how much life I got to live.

5. I hate being negative but this is one of the few places I can let down the fake smiles and cheer to vent it out. And, yes I feel better now...ready to get on with life.

Spoon

Tonight we went to Grandma's house and ate beef stew for dinner. Wee one was poking her spoon in her bowl as usual. She likes to poke it in her food and has been more interested lately in it, but most of her eating is still by hand. I gave her a few spoons of soup and then I started eating. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her dipping her spoon in, lifting it up to her lips and sipping her soup with very little dripping off the edges. She did this over and over again and even got some of the vegetables in. She took her square of cornbread and broke it into piece and dropped then into her soup. Then she spoon up the bread soaked soup to eat. She ate a lot...perhaps a growth spurt or perhaps the novelty of using a utensil to get food in. So cool!

The joys of motherhood

I am really liking this age of childhood right now. Wee one is cute, funny, talktative (baby babble...nothing is actually in plain American English), and all around entertaining and easily entertained. She walks, she sleeps at night, and when she eats, it is fun to watch how much she can pack away. Today I gave her some soup and afterwards she took the bowl and spoon and "fed" me. Later on, I saw her trying to feed her stuffed bear. I tried to get a picture, but she saw me and wanted the camera.

Superbitchy

Yesterday I had a meltdown. It was the last day of Aunt Flo, dh & I went to Target for some early Xmas Shopping, I had a nice lunch, I picked out paint colors for the new house, and all was well. Then wee one had bubbly noises in her pants and I unwrapped them to be greeted with DIARRHEA. I undressed her and gave her a bath. DH came in to ask me if I was sure it was diarrhea and I told him I could take the dripping diaper out of the wastecan if he wished to see it. Then I started crying.

He, of course, was my dh, having witnessed a few of my hormonal imbalances once before was comforting and gave me hugs through the rest of the day even when I was really, really trying to bite his head off. He said I had been thorough a lot of things (sickness, foot injury, family gatherings) this past week. I babbled on about how much I missed the Christmases of my childhood church (as we attend his family's church, it is really, really different...no Advent, no candles, no music, nothing but a modern auditorium), and how I didn't think I could create the uber-Christmas festivals his Mom created (and still creates) each year...we have no tree as I gave ours away thinking we'd be moving by now and getting a new one. He reminded me that I was doing fine and that he didn't expect any uber Christmas festivals, etc. and that if it helped we could attend my style of church as needed. He is the best.

I am ok today after some sleep and candy and spending some $$ at the Nordstrom website. I think I was just worn out.

Toddler food

Wee one is currently eating a chocolate Power Bar (dh's breakfast of choice). I know, bad mom, will have hyper toddler for the next few hours. Make me think wistfully of the days of breast vs. formula.

Blahs

Woke up last night at 4AM with a temp of 102...felt crappy...baby had had a temp of 103 that afternoon earlier. I also had some diarrhea and lo and behold, my period started. Dizzy, weak, and full of Tylenol (and a super tampon), I went to work today (also cold front blew through and it is windy, windy, windy and 32 outside), but decided to cut my day short and head home at noon. I know I am sick because I don't want to eat. I fell better now, but tired. I have been doing too many things lately...I need to slow down a bit. One of my patients asked me if I had had my 2nd child already as she had heard I was pregnant. I said no, and I was not aware of this. (And besides, my period has been making regular appearances). I know, these blahs will pass.

Thanksgiving memories

1. DH improved but continued to have some unplesant GI problems that had me yelling "Vent fan!" each time he entered the bathroom.
2. Broke 4th toe on left foot going to get a cookie out of my kitchen pantry on Thanksgiving night.
3. Have never broken a bone before. Have never screamed "FUCK!!!!!!" out loud in my house before.
4. Flew to Vegas for my sister's wedding.
5. Hobbled up aisle as gracefully as possible, as priest called me a "crip"
6. DH incredibly helpful with wee one and patient with me inspite of issues as noted above.
7. Loved seeing my family and meeting new family
8. Finally relaxed few hours before wedding as I laid by the pool in the sun while dh played with wee one
9. Wee one looked adorable in cute dress (velvet and satin...got at Wally world for only $17....colors matched wedding party). Even drill seargent church lady/ wedding coordinator called her a little angel
10. Got thru airport and flew home with nary a problem.

Happy now and tired. HAPPY TG everyone!

Yet something else to stress about

Well, dh got a new litterbox and so far the last 2 evenings have been free of me griping about the cat pee all over the floor.

However, dh somehow got a stomach bug today and now I am terrified that wee one or I will get sick and somehow miss Thanksgiving and my only sister's wedding. My stomach just churns to think about it. I have been willing it not to happen.

UPDATE: DH just got out of bed (for the 1st time in the last 8 hours) and peed and said, "I feel a whole lot better."

UPDATE 5 minutes later: DH is sitting in front of TV eating cereal and watching "Sex and the City"...he REALLY is sick.

Pissing on the floor

OK, the Thanksgiving holiday is coming up, I can't find the remote to my TIVO (last seen in the possession of wee one 4 days ago), my sister is getting married this Saturday, and I am bringing wee one on a trip to Las Vegas for the wedding, and what am I stressed out about?

One of my cats is peeing on the floor under/ next to the litter box. I don't know which one is doing it or how or why it is happening, but I can't stand smell the horrible odor of cat urine in the back part of my house. My DH is currently out purchasing a new litter box in hopes that this will stop happening and that his wife will stop being in a pissy mood.

One of the cats had a bladder blockage a few years ago, but the symptoms did not include peeing on the floor near the box. They seem healthy and normal as usual so I have no idea what is going on.